Woodchuck Wisdom

And we are obviously buying less and conscious of all our choices - escaping the consumerism of elaborate do-it-yourself decor and prepared cuisine, the soccer mom mystique, and the bored, lazy, 'gimme' kids. Sometimes a quote comes along that really fits the way you think and live. This is one of those quotes, and the best part is that it comes from my DW. When you spoil you kids with love and a learning environment, no problem. I do believe that some parents do really take care of their kids and teach them to be strong non-whining adults that work to support themselves and intern teach the next generation to do the same. Then there is the rest of the parents that are raising whining think that they deserve everything but don't want to work for it spoiled brats that will complain about the government full time, but are the first ones there with their hands out and still think the should get more.... assbites! Then again some people complain about the way we raise our kids ...

Thursday is take you child to work day. All this time I thought it was...put your child to work day....silly me! You should have seen the look on the tween's faces when I told them...SO, you still have to do the chores.

Then..... Now.... I do find the new steed to be a little easier to see over the wheel.

Living in the great Northwest allows the viewing of many mountains during one's travels. I love the Portland area except for the fact that Mt Hood is just such a poor excuse for a real mountain. It is a nice mountain as mountains go, the fact is that it's just there. Then we have day's like today where one truly sees Mt Hood as she is and one must admit what a fine mountain she is. Disclaimer: These pictures were taken through a dirty front windscreen while traveling at a high rate of speed and at a distance of approximately 100 miles from the mountain.

I know that you can't really see it, but trust me it is there. SNOW...in the middle of April and I'm driving in it on my way to Coville Washington.

Don't ask how we got to this point, just accept that fact that we did. Small Rodent one = SR1 Small Rodent two = SR2 ME: Speaking of Mas Tequila, who sang the song and what band was he in. I will accept any one of the three.. SM2: Nirvana? ME: Close, you see the singer did sing in a band whose lead guitar player went on to play for a band from Seattle that in 1981 was the opening band for one of the other bands that the singer was in. ME: clue...he is called the "Red Rocker" DW: David Lee Roth?? ME: Very close, although this is the only singer for Van Halen, most consider the other guy to have replaced Roth. DW: Sammy Hagar? ME: We have a winner. SM1: So what does Sammy Hagar have to do with Seattle? ME: Well in his early days he sang for Montrose with Ronnie Montrose in the band. Ronnie Montrose later went on to play for a band called Black and Blue out of Seattle who was the opening act for Van Halan in 1981. Sammy later went on to be the lead singer for Van Hagar in ...

Just when I thought that I could put the winter hat away for the season.... I end up driving home in this crap! Snow you say...It's almost April for someones sake..... What does one have to do to get out of the snow? I may need to get a smaller hat and deal with it. An update on the " Candy Land Bakery "...well I took the small rodents to the bakery this weekend to prove that I don't make this stuff up as I go along. As I pull up to the bakery, the nice little yellow ginger bread decorated house, I hear from the back seat of the new steed, "O snap, I was sure he was making that one up". This proves my theory of stories, prove them when you can and baffle them when you can't.

and just like a train wreck..I keep going back for more. I found a great little Gluten Free bakery today and purchased some nice little goodies for my children. Tonight I set up the little surprise with a nice drawn out tale of the bakery and how I taste tested all of these fine breads and such. EL: So dad, what is the name of the bakery? me: Candy Land Bakery Ray: no really, what's the name? me: CANDY LAND BAKERY, what do you think, I make this stuff up as I go along? Everyone: Yes. Herumph! Please note, My DW repeated the whole thing again just to make sure I got it. Double herumph!

I'm doing the best furry Jig that I can and still nothing....nothing I tell you. Oh why can't I come up with anything funny or practical to say???? DW is still happy that I'm home more. I guess I lost the bet on that one. I said three weeks, four tops and she would be begging me to go back on the road. But, for now she is still happy. At least as happy as wives can get. No little Squirrel as of yet. I'm calling everyday around the 9am hour as daddy Squirrel does not get up before then to get the latest update. I should start backing that time up so that he gets used to getting up earler. Our other house sold today. Wahooo on that one. I think that DW and Meritt should get together sometime. Although I must admit I do believe that the universe as we know it might end. I've picked out the restaurant and coffee shop for when TR and WH come to the Northwest. One must return the favor of the great time that I had when I had dinner in their home state. I would expect that...

As I arrive downstairs today to do my morning "daddy" stuff. I find that one of my small rodents has made me a sandwich for my lunch. I think to myself, how wonderful and nice my kids are. Only to have the larger of the rodents pop off, "I put mustard on that one by mistake and I don't like mustard, so I thought you could eat it". I love my kids I love my kids

First kids are cute....just look a the little "poopie" and then someone puts smell into the poop and then you can't wait for the kid to use the toilet. But, they are still cute anyway. However, as they move into the tween years the cuteness starts to wear off and then you have teenagers and there is nothing cute about teenagers. I'm talking with one such teenager tonight when the term "I know" comes out of her mouth. At this point Mom just walks away mumbling something about "since you know, well you can just do it yourself" or something along those line. The teenager in question starts yelling "that's not what I meant....I'm sorry...". At least that is what I heard, however, I'm not fluent in "teenager" and I made not have translated it correctly. I mention that she should not say "I know" to her mother. She replies to me that it's a bad habit that she is trying to break. And my response to her......

You can't cut down the tallest tree in the forest with a herring – it just can't be done (honest). The most dangerous of animals is a clever sheep Never trust strangers in suits of armour carrying chickens European swallows don't migrate Coconuts don’t migrate. Albatross: 1. (n) A web-footed bird, of the genus Diomedea, of which there are several species. They are the largest of sea birds, capable of long-continued flight, and are often seen at great distances from the land. They are found chiefly in the southern hemisphere. 2. (n) A sea bird flavoured refreshment sold in cinemas by a person who may (or may not) be a woman. You do not get wafers with albatrosses.

And as I'm reading these to you know who...all she says is "when did you get that letter and when were you in K Mart?".

I have returned. Let the next invasion start right after Tea.

I sit here at the airport going through my normal routine waiting for my flight to California. I'm looking around and relize that this will be my last time here for a while. As many of you know, I've resigned my position with my current employer and have decided to take a position with a company out of Canada. I will be traveling less and what travel I will do will be by truck. Changing jobs and moving from what I love to do to something that I'm sure to love just as much, but the unknow is always challageing at best. I'm looking foward to being home with my DW and kids (chickens not included) and trying to become domesticated. My flight calls...more soon.

RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE 1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.............She goes on Tuesdays; I go on Fridays. 2. We also sleep in separate beds............Hers is in California, and mine is in Texas 3. I take my wife everywhere...........but she keeps finding her way back. 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. 'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!' she said...........So I suggested the kitchen. 5. We always hold hands...........If I let go, she shops. 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said 'There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!' So I bought her an electric chair. 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, 'In the lake.' 8. She got a mud pack, and looked great for two days........Then the mud...

I better get a bigger truck!

And just for the record, I had over 400 miles of this stuff. Or a lot worse that this depending on how you look at it. I'm not easy to intimidate when it comes to driving on snow. You might even say that I like driving on snow better than dry blacktop. Just ask Squirrel, he has been sideways more than once in the passengers seat. However, I was getting tired of snow this trip. Snow no matter where you go. At least the sun was out for part of the trip. Everything tends to look better covered in snow. Three days, 1585 miles total, over 400 on snow or ice. Good thing I had my eyes closed so much.

And I will be your Dam tour guide... If you have any Dam question or need any Dam information, please let me know. Now if you all will please get into the Dam train, I will be operating the Dam train on the Dam tour today. The Dam volunteers thank you for coming on this Dam tour.

One might want to slow down.....maybe? I mean the speed limit is 75mph. Time to run around in the snow. I just love this picture, that's why it is here twice. It's the road to nowhere. Trees sometimes look better in formal wear. (snow)